Facets of You

– The Guy

I don’t pretend to know what it’s like to be a girl. I’m a guy, and always have been. Unless you want to count boyhood separately. So I don’t really know how you feel, and I can’t tell you how to escape this glossed-over world, but I can tell you what it looks like to me when you’re a part of it, and why I like it when you’re not.

Being glossed tells me that you expect me to be superficial. I don’t like it because it’s an insult to my depth of character. It’s frustrating. It tells me that you don’t know how much I value inner beauty, the real stuff.

If you’re glossed enough, it looks like you WANT me to be superficial. It tells me that you have no idea that there is more on my radar than hotness. As if you’re looking to attract the next dope-headed hunk to sweep you off your feet for a few minutes until he drops you on the floor to reach for the next girl. But sometimes, if I look hard enough to get past the immediate shock of hotness, I’ll see a glimpse of something deeper, more meaningful; but it is as if you are hiding in plain sight behind a mask and a costume. It’s sad to me because you want something deeper than what you’re getting.

Sometimes I see a girl all dolled up, obviously trying too hard, and I wish that she would put on some clothes, get rid of the mask, go wash out the hairspray, and just be herself. For example, I would love to meet some random famous actress… at a coffee shop, in normal clothes and in a goofy mood. That would be just awesome. “You know every movie she was in, you can quote all of her lines, but I know who she really is in real life. I win.”

When you escape the gloss, you become real. Really real. With all that plastic and paint outof the way, it’s easier to see who’s really in there. It’s a honor, because you’re trusting me to see more deeply than a camera, and to care about what I see. It puts me at ease. I mean, there is such a thing as looking like a slob, and that’s not cool, but I’m talking about just being you. I like it when you wear your hair however you like it, just because you like it. I like it because that way you’re expressing something you like, therefore a part of your personality is on display. I like it when you put on a little makeup to enhance what’s there rather than trying to transform your face into something out of a magazine because I get to see YOU. If I wanted the magazine, I would have gotten it. I’m your friend because I want to get to know you. I like it when you dress so that I’m drawn to your eyes, because that’s where I see the depth I appreciate so much, that is where your personality shines through all the time.


  1. Em said,

    December 23, 2010 at 4:43 pm

    Thank you for that, Guy. (I can’t tell you how strange that felt writing “Guy” as the name.) This site inspired me to wear little or no make up, maybe just to be different, but this post reminded me of… well, everything. 🙂 I could go on a while, but basically I was reminded what this site was about. Thank you.


  2. Marie said,

    December 26, 2010 at 10:04 am

    I like this, I really do. It’s saying that inner beauty matters mire to a guy like you etc. But sometimes it isn’t just about guys. Sometimes I dress up for me, to satisfy my own vanity. Because I know that there are people who will pay more attention if I am glossy enough. It’s like getting your friend to push you high on the swing just so you can say you went high up. Sometimes dressing up is fun. And it’s a discipline thing too. If I dressed exactly how I felt most of the time, there are many people who wouldn’t even want to get to know the beautiful inner me. And it would not be because those people are superficial. That’s the simple truth.

  3. The Guy said,

    December 31, 2010 at 11:42 pm

    Thank you, Em. I’m glad to hear this site is making a difference! Stand strong, girl.

    That’s a good point, Marie. I think there is a big difference between dressing up on occasion for the fun of it or dressing up as a way of life.

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